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Creating Space for Self-Growth

Last year I made the decision to cut my natural hair. I then wrote one of my first blog post about how through cutting my hair, I learnt how to stop watering dead situations in my life. So here is an update….

Cutting my hair was the change I needed to shift me from the position of being content, to being uncomfortable. After cutting the little hair I even had at the start, I cleared my desk of all the Paks, Hairmasters and Afroworld products. I had about 8 different leave-in conditions, 7 moisturisers, 5 essentials oils and yet no hair to show for it. The process of clearing out the clutter I held onto for so long was emotionally draining, but I tell you this now; you can not open your hands to take in anything new if your hands are still filled with yesterdays clutter.

What are you still holding onto?

Are you still clinging to what feels familiar or comfortable?

Does the effort of letting go feel great than the effort of keeping things the same?

By getting rid of what I didn’t need, it essentially helped me to see what I already had but I also saw what I was missing. In the midst of watering dead situations, I neglected what was really important. The environment you surround yourself in can often reflect what's going on mentally and therefore a build-up of clutter can be a well-known factor for depression and anxiety.

I realised I was at a place of full capacity when I felt a sense of stagnation. I felt like I was not growing or developing in the way I knew I could. I had to accept that in order to expand on my capacity, I had to address the limitations that acted as obstacles to my development. The first lesson i had to learn was that self-growth is a never-ending process.

I used the second half 2020 to create new space for new growth, and with the same energy I used to cut my hair, I cut off every piece of deadweight that was taking up more space in my life than its value. Creating space is the ability of opening up your time, energy and physical capacity to allow more space for the things that matter.

I always say that anything that does not add value to me, does not deserve my time or space. For some of you that is toxic relationships, bad habits, outdated ideologies and even dead flowers that you continue to waste your water on.

Four ways i make space for self-growth:

  1. Refocus your attention. Your goal should no longer be the destination but focus on the lessons that you will learn whilst on the journey.

  2. Reassign your time. Your issue is not that you do not have enough time, your issue is you don’t know how to prioritise. Start each day with an intentional mindset and arrange each task according to importance.

  3. Learn to say no to others and yes to yourself. You need to do some soul searching and regain control of your own happiness where you are the priority. Self love is the best love.

  4. Face your fears. Fears can cause you to avoid your dreams and keep you away from improving and growing yourselves. So attack each fear with boldness and courage.

Once you learn to create space for your growth you regain a sense of control, reduce levels of anxiety and depression, gain a sense of achievement, release old baggage that weighed you down and most importantly, you create space for new things.

As you create the space for your growth, do not shrink yourself to fit into spaces that you do not belong in. Spaces that your large goals were made to surpass. Over and over again i see young women give the world the permission and authority to dim their light and make them smaller. Let this be a reminder that you are more expansive than the space permitted by your imagination. Step into the new year and take up the place, let your presence be felt from a mile away. So enter as all of you, leaving nothing behind.

Yours Sincerely

Joan Idowu

CEO of Several Seats

Image 1: This is my little sister, last year she also made the decision to shave her hair. She is my Inspiration for this blog post and the reason why I am passionate about what I do. A young woman that embodies everything Bold, Bright and Beautiful.

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